THE longest table lunch ever in the history of Manjimup, Australia and probably most other regions, was held in the middle of a cherry orchard today (or last weekend).

The brains behind the event organised for four World Class Chefs to prepare five courses to eat alongside the best wines available on the planet.

It should also be made clear that the almost 250 people sat at one table, not five alongside each other. If you were down one end you had to call a taxi to get to the other end. One patron, separated from his partner, took five hours to make his way under the table in a frantic search for his loved one, or someone to love, or someone he once loved, no-one knew.

In fact, the food was delivered along the length of the table from the back of a truck.

And here, right after the inaugural Loquat Stone Spitting Championship of the Planet, are three men who featured but lost.

On the left is up and coming spitter, Jeff Pow, in the middle the spit-caller, Jon Doust, and on the right an up-and-coming spit-caller, Wyatt Nixon-Lloyd.

The spitting competition was won by someone whose name we have forgotten, but he will be back to spit again, he assured us, made it clear he felt chuffed and pumped by his win, even though no-one congratulated him or went anywhere near him when the event was over.

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